The answer: G-i-b-s-o-n!
Yes, the catalogs are here. It is such torture. I get to see them all and drool. The price of the Explorer has gone down to $750. It's still a good bit out of my price range, and it is not even the model that I so long to own. It's a brown wood grain finish one. Lord only knows how much I would have to pay for my beloved plain white one...
A lady on my route was telling me about how her brother (no kids, decent job, lives with mom & dad) plunked out $3000 to buy her sons a couple of Gibson guitars for Christmas last year. Damn, I wish he were MY uncle! Wait a minute...I am his mail lady. Perhaps if I give him extra special service...
Oh, God! I can see the headlines now. "Mail Carrier Fired for Exchanging Sexual Favors for Gibson Guitar."
